9/11 five years later...

Every year, on the anniversary of 9/11, I've sent email to friends and people close to me reflecting on the events of that day. Here's the one I sent this morning....

I can’t believe that this is the fifth of these emails that I have sent…I send them because I feel it is one small thing I can do to keep the memory of this tragedy alive, and to ensure that we never forget it…in many important ways, this is and will forever be the defining event of our generation.

On September 11, 2001, I was in the office early. I was to do a presentation on Microsoft’s Collaboration Strategy for a customer from Detroit in our EBC with my boss. He called me on his way in to ask me to stop by his office and pick up a couple things he needed for the demos we were planning to do. As I stepped out of my office to go retrieve them, my phone rang again, him again, to tell me that a plane had just hit the World Trade Center. What a tragic accident!

By the time I got everything together and got up to the EBC, the second plane had hit, and there were reports that the White House had been hit, followed shortly thereafter by the news that it was the Pentagon, not the White House. We were at war…there was no doubt about that.

We stood, with the folks from the customer, gathered around a television in one of the displays that was then up at the EBC, and watched the live coverage, and watched as the first tower fell. Our customer was calling back to folks in their headquarters in Detroit. If somebody was hitting buildings symbolizing American capitalism, maybe their headquarters would be a target, too. “What about Microsoft?”, I wondered…surely, if people were targeting symbols of American capitalism, Microsoft was right up there…to say that it was a confusing, scary morning just doesn’t begin to capture it. There was going to be no collab strategy presentation this morning…

I called my wife…it didn’t take much to decide I needed to be with her and our children. She and I used to live in Hoboken, New Jersey, across the river from New York City. I worked then at Lotus’s NYC office on Whitehall Street, she worked in Greenwich Village at NYU. Each morning, we would board the PATH train from Hoboken, into the World Trade Center. I would head up the escalators from the PATH station, past the commuter bar (there was eerie video later of the commuter bar, looking like a moment in time, interrupted suddenly, but otherwise untouched), up the wide bank of escalators that led to the shopping mall in the basement of the center, past all the shops, up the last set of escalators that led to the doors and out to the street…and every day, I’d reverse that trip on my way home…

When I think back on that day, I still can’t shake the thought that, had one or two life decisions gone differently, I could still have been at Lotus, in New York, on my way to work that morning…there, but for the grace of God…

Over the next couple of days, we learned of loss. One of my wife’s friends was on American Airlines flight 11, as were two other people I didn’t know directly, but was connected to. One was one of the earliest Lotus employees, who had gone on to found her own successful company, and the other was the daughter of a guy I worked with who had come over from IBM after they acquired Lotus. Five more of my wife's friends from college, who worked at Cantor Fitzgerald, were among the dead. And the number of friends we had who had lost husbands or wives or children or friends or knew someone who had was staggering…

I was back in New York in November, 2001, and was completely overwhelmed… Arriving at Grand Central Station, walking past endless, hastily erected bulletin boards with pictures of the missing, phone numbers to call if you knew anything about where they might be…as I made my way over to the Microsoft office, walking past fire stations, the sidewalks in front covered with flowers, pictures of the firefighters from that station who had perished taped up on the doors…a bronze statue of two firefighters, delivered on a flatbed trailer, and not yet unloaded, parked on the side of the street next door to a fire station…we all saw the footage on television, but it did not begin to convey the enormity of the loss…the sorrow and desperation of those who still, two months later, didn’t know, because very few intact bodies were recovered, whether their loved ones had perished, or might be in a hospital somewhere, or suffering amnesia…the scale of the devastation, the wreckage of the buildings still burning at ground zero the absolute silence on the streets down near ground zero, on Wall Street, on Broadway…

Five years later, everything is different, though we’ve become increasingly acclimated to what was called, early on, “the new normal.” Regardless your religious beliefs, regardless your political leanings, there’s no doubt that life today is different than it was five years ago this morning, and it’s not necessarily better. My wish and my prayer for all of you, and for myself, is that, out of this experience, we will all be a little more tolerant, a little more forgiving, a little more focused on the things which truly matter in life…

Thanks for reading. Never forget…